Is there a choice?  Many times, yes.  My husband once asked me if I didn’t just want to be happy, and I replied that I’d rather be at peace.

The way I see it, happiness depends largely on the external circumstances of our life.  The feeling of happiness is transitory, and what makes us happy today can make us unfulfilled or sad tomorrow.  How many times have you purchased something (like a new car) thinking it would make you happy, and then months later it no longer brings the same feeling?  We get used to things that make us happy after awhile, and that feeling wears off.  And, nature of life itself is transitory; meaning that even if something brings us happiness there’s no guarantee that it will still be around tomorrow.  Just look to the stock market as an example.

That’s why I’d prefer to be at peace.  I may not always be able to be happy, such as when I lose a loved one, but I can always feel peace beneath any situation.  Part of that comes from believing that there is more to me than my life situation, that the essence of who I am is untouched even in my own death.  I also believe in the wisdom of reality and know that there have many times I have not gotten what I wanted and I was just as happy.  I can still enjoy things, but I don’t have to cling to their ending.  I can appreciate beauty all the more because I know and accept that it is fleeting.  I can love others more deeply because I see the wisdom in their own path, even if it is very different from what I might choose for myself.

To not seek happiness through the next experience, the next material thing, the next relationship means to find something deeper instead – joy, which is the emotion connected to peace.